30.07.2020

Today's lady armour for the discerning revolutionary has been seasonally adjusted to suit the new demands of 2020. Comfort is finally key. Combining a thick protective covering with a faux portable doona that you can deftly stop, drop and roll in is the new black. And too a genius innovation that affords you shielding and softness, with no need to squish yourself into any uncomfortable middle ground.

Because let's face it women of the rebirthing world, we are the frontlines. We are making most of the noise and covering the hard yards first. And running the gauntlet on shifting sands in a clunking suit of leaden armour is as much extra work as a marathon in stits.

Birth canal chic was the earliest heads up that the labour of worldwide revolution had begun. Tube dresses were excavated from the great fashion tombs of the 80s. The classic wrap dress was tripled and still flattered all comers. Tight turtlenecks that could not be stretched over giant goddess hair without a fashion episiotomy began appearing quietly under blazers, with hidden zips and shoulders you could cut teeth on. A movement had begun.

But without rotating runways and as fashion seasons were traded for the rooms of your house, wardrobe requirements shifted. Karl Lagerfield's famous assertion that trackpants were a sign of defeat was bedazzled and repackaged into a fashionably punk middle finger, especially if you wore them with matching mask to the shops to get milk of magnesia.

Though today's OOTD does not afford the 80 / 20 vision required to deftly navigate the landscape, it offers instead a willing cocoon and a soft place to rest your weary head. Its sumptuous lining is crafted from retired care bears and the garment is free from triggers and hangnails. It fits snugly over your buttons with enough padding that errant salty fingers don't even touch the sides. Optional accessories sewn into its lining activate additional force fields or up periscope upon command.

Truly darklings, this is the classic soft landing that feels like a snugly thicker second skin. Wrap thyself in its everloving folds. And rest.

Pictured is Verushka modelling an early prototype for Vogue in 1968 during the last accredited revolution chic movement.

Words c. Kerrie Basha 2020