A Very Virgo Inner Critique

These beauties came home with me last night after a delicious full mooner, direct from the altar. Honouring the Virgo moon I chose to focus meditation on the shadow side of this energy that can often wallop us by fuelling our inner critic. This in-house naysayer, whose oxygen is criticism and whose routine belittlement serves only to lower our head, tries to keep us safe by keeping us small. Yet to realise that mistakes are our greatest teachers, the critic tries to prevent any kind of failure or misstep in the first place, holding us struck dumb with harsh tough love.

The thing is this voice in our heads is learned behaviour. It often mimics those well meaning guardians of our formative years who saw we needed guidance but perhaps framed it harshly, without understanding the lingering imprint. I'm being generous here - maybe they were flat out horrible to you. No matter their story, when little you replays the criticism ad nauseam it becomes your own voice, which is why we keep listening, long after we learned to do better. And cringing, still bowed by this boom of authority.

Unlike when you were little you can talk back. You can find out what this overworked critic's truest intention is for you. It is kindness deep down, horribly wrapped in judgement and swaddled in disapproval but well intentioned nonetheless. Co-opt this flailing critic into your service, to become a constructive ally who you can gently chide when they are hindering not helping. The critic will always be a player on your team but let them occupy the bench and learn how to cheer from the sidelines.

This too is self care and part of the winding path that we take as we learn to love all of ourselves, especially our shadows. When it comes to the good work of our life, we are constantly required to shine a light into the dark corners. With practice and some good growing up, we cease to be scared of the dark.

When you know better, you do better
~ Maya Angelou

Words c. Kerrie Basha 2016